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Old 10-08-2014, 01:47 PM   #1
futuredad
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Surrogacy/Adoption confusion

Hello,

I've never posted on anything like this, but I literally have no idea where to turn. I'm being given the run a round from attorneys across the board, so here goes.

My wife and I are unable to have children. We currently reside in the Denver area of Colorado. We have a mutual acquaintance in Tennessee who just told me 2 days ago she is 4 weeks pregnant. She does not know the father, as it was a one night stand - moment of indiscretion. She literally just gave birth less than 90 days ago, and she knows she is unable to properly care for 2 newborns.

She has offered to sign over her parental rights to me so I can 'adopt' this baby as my own. I'm not sure if it's considered an adoption or not. I've spoken to an attorney in Colorado who says to contact someone in TN, and I've contacted an attorney in TN and they refer us back to Colorado laws.

My wife and I want to give this baby the best home possible, and we are SO excited for the opportunity - I just don't know how to go about it.

Based on the above statement, my questions are as follows:

1. She does not know the father or how to locate him. Would the father need to be located and consent in order to sign her parental rights over?
2. Would I have to treat this as an adoption and go through the court proceedings for that?
3. What protections can I lay in place to protect my assets if she decided to change her mind and keep the baby?

I want to know the easiest way to make this happen. I will be traveling to TN when she goes in to labor and take the baby from there, if this is possible.

Any help/advice is greatly appreciated.
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Old 10-08-2014, 02:08 PM   #2
AFFA
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Default Re: Surrogacy/Adoption confusion

I wish to inform you that after the birth of the child if paternity and biological father are not established then the mother may give the child in adoption to you. The earliest the birth mother may surrender the child to you as the adopted parents is 4 days after birth of the child under a Court order. The birth mother will still have 10 days after the surrender to change her mind. Further, if the birth mother knowingly does not reveal the name of the father then it constitutes a Class A misdemeanor in Tennessee and the birth father may subsequently challenge the adoption. You may consult an attorney and seek guidance.

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Old 10-08-2014, 03:24 PM   #3
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Default Re: Surrogacy/Adoption confusion

Quote:
Originally Posted by futuredad View Post
Hello,

I've never posted on anything like this, but I literally have no idea where to turn. I'm being given the run a round from attorneys across the board, so here goes.

My wife and I are unable to have children. We currently reside in the Denver area of Colorado. We have a mutual acquaintance in Tennessee who just told me 2 days ago she is 4 weeks pregnant. She does not know the father, as it was a one night stand - moment of indiscretion. She literally just gave birth less than 90 days ago, and she knows she is unable to properly care for 2 newborns.

She has offered to sign over her parental rights to me so I can 'adopt' this baby as my own. I'm not sure if it's considered an adoption or not. I've spoken to an attorney in Colorado who says to contact someone in TN, and I've contacted an attorney in TN and they refer us back to Colorado laws.

My wife and I want to give this baby the best home possible, and we are SO excited for the opportunity - I just don't know how to go about it.

Based on the above statement, my questions are as follows:

1. She does not know the father or how to locate him. Would the father need to be located and consent in order to sign her parental rights over?
2. Would I have to treat this as an adoption and go through the court proceedings for that?
3. What protections can I lay in place to protect my assets if she decided to change her mind and keep the baby?

I want to know the easiest way to make this happen. I will be traveling to TN when she goes in to labor and take the baby from there, if this is possible.

Any help/advice is greatly appreciated.
Your best choice is to contact a family law attorney in Tennessee to handle the adoption for you. Without the father being identified, their law may require publication. Otherwise, she can voluntary surrender her parental rights to you two for adoption which if approved by the court means you can take the baby home as your child. Part of the adoption process will be to issue a new birth certificate showing you and your spouse as the natural parents. Adoption files are then sealed.

At any time before the adoption takes place, she can change her mind. That is her prerogative as natural mother. So, keep a hold on your heart, take the trip and hope all goes well. But you do need to do an official court adoption to make everything legal.


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Old 10-08-2014, 05:22 PM   #4
Disagreeable
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Default Re: Surrogacy/Adoption confusion

Quote:
1. She does not know the father or how to locate him. Would the father need to be located and consent in order to sign her parental rights over?
Even if she tries to contact by publication, you risk him coming back down the road to assert parental rights.
Quote:
2. Would I have to treat this as an adoption and go through the court proceedings for that?
Yep, A TN lawyer can handle it. Get someone who specializes.
Quote:
3. What protections can I lay in place to protect my assets if she decided to change her mind and keep the baby?
You are not supposed to be buying the child. Your expenses should be limited to legal. If you agree to reimburse for medical have it written to be paid post adoption.
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Old 10-09-2014, 01:37 AM   #5
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Default Re: Surrogacy/Adoption confusion

Since you will be actually adopting in the state of Colorado you will need an attorney there to help you jump through all the hoops necessary. There's lots of documentation that needs to be done, from birth moms medical/ethnic background to a home study and criminal background checks on you two.

This is in no way a surrogacy as this child carries no DNA from either of you. It's a straight up adoption.
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Old 10-09-2014, 07:20 AM   #6
Lexus
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Default Re: Surrogacy/Adoption confusion

You cannot adopt an unborn child. Once the child is born, you can act immediately be filing a petition for Adoption. In adoption, the parental rights of the natural parents must be legally terminated. Therefore the biological mother would have to voluntarily terminate her parental rights. An adoption is a complicated legal procedure. Therefore hire an attorney to assist you.
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Old 04-02-2018, 04:33 AM   #7
Gabi52
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Default Re: Surrogacy/Adoption confusion

I did this procedure In Ukraine. There are such surrogacy and IVF agencies as Biotexcom, Isida, Babyboom. When I was choosing to go for Surrogacy, I decided to visit Kiev first and to see all clinics. So we came, talked to all of them. Finally, we agreed to work with babyboom.



good luck!
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Old 04-02-2018, 09:38 AM   #8
adjusterjack
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Default Re: Surrogacy/Adoption confusion

Quote:
Originally Posted by futuredad View Post

She has offered to sign over her parental rights to me so I can 'adopt' this baby as my own. I'm not sure if it's considered an adoption or not.
It's not. And her doing it won't mean a thing without a judge's signature. She'd be able to take the baby back at any time and so would CPS.

Quote:
Originally Posted by futuredad View Post

1. She does not know the father or how to locate him. Would the father need to be located and consent in order to sign her parental rights over?
Not necessarily. A court could waive that requirement depending on the circumstances.

Quote:
Originally Posted by futuredad View Post

2. Would I have to treat this as an adoption and go through the court proceedings for that?
Yes.

Otherwise you are just babysitting.



Quote:
Originally Posted by futuredad View Post
3. What protections can I lay in place to protect my assets if she decided to change her mind and keep the baby?
I don't know. That's what you hire a lawyer for.

Quote:
Originally Posted by futuredad View Post

I want to know the easiest way to make this happen. I will be traveling to TN when she goes in to labor and take the baby from there, if this is possible.
There is no easy way. And it's not cheap either. You don't just "take the baby." You'll need an adoption order from the court.
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Old 04-03-2018, 07:34 AM   #9
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Default Re: Surrogacy/Adoption confusion

And you better have a lawyer involved in all of that.
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